5 things you should concentrate on during self-improvement

Have you ever asked yourself, “Why do I do it?” Self-improvement has become quite popular during the pandemic. During the past two years, self-improvement was in decline. Why did that happen?

First, we need to ask ourselves why we improve, what we want to improve, and what should be the single goal of self-improvement.

During my three years of self-improvement, I have observed many people who focus solely on workouts or making money. These are important, I agree. In life, we need to be healthy and fit, and we also need to have enough money to live and survive. So that point is totally fair, but should this be the only thing?

Self-improvement is so much more than gaining a positive and healthy life. There are additional areas for improvement, but we should also consider whether we need to focus on that particular aspect. The question is up to you to decide.

1. Seek Fulfillment

Don’t we all seek a happy and fulfilling life? We want our needs to be fulfilled; that is clear. And we all think we know the answer, or we are seeking for answers. Some people are convinced that love will fulfill them, or dating many women, or being super rich. This is something we can think but never know. But after all, whatever we think the right solution is, we work towards it. And we work hard, productively, and cleverly on that goal. But there is only one thing that is worse than a missed goal, and that’s a succeeded goal, where you realize it was never worth it. When you have that life with many girls you can hook up with, or you are super rich. But even though you reached this goal, you can realize it doesn’t fulfill you.

There are people who succeed in these aspects, and they claim that this is the goal we all should strive for. But even if they claim to be fulfilled, this could as well be a lie they tell to themselves and to you. So is there a true way of knowing, “That will make me fulfilled”?

I have my idea of fulfillment, and so do you possibly. I can and will tell you my version, but it will be biased. The world is full of religions, philosophical doctrines, and ideologies. SO many ideas exist on how to become fulfilled. With that it will be hard to really know, “That is how to get fulfilled“. Maybe there is just one way and different wrong ways, or different ways to achieve the same goal. And there will always remain the question of whether it’s worth being fulfilled when this action will hurt other people.

2. Mindset and Resilience

Money, Family Life, and the Playboy Hedonistic Lifestyle, etc. Those have all one thing in common: they are exterior ways to reach fulfillment. You seek for something external of your body to achieve an internal feeling of happiness and fulfillment. That’s also a reason why we sometimes procrastinate. The movies we watch, the games we play, and the parties we go to, those are all short-term options to gain happiness, which is internal. We trick our brain into releasing dopamine.

But next to all these things, there are also internal ways to reach fulfillment. The ones who often talk about this are mostly religious people from different religions. Like monks in Christian or Buddhist monasteries. They don’t have anything you claim will “make you fulfilled“, no money, no girls, no marriage, no family, etc. They just live a deeply internal way of living.

Meditation is one practice very common in Buddhism. It allows you to reach your mind. The possibilities of meditations and other religious practices are interesting. Reaching fulfillment is so easy. Now that doesn’t mean we need to live a religious life in a monastery; no, we just can adopt some of these practices. I have some experience with meditations, and when I do it, I mostly feel better or great. But I also experienced times when it did not do much. In fact, the “happiest” I have ever been was not from those internal ways to reach fulfillment. So I still have to learn, and so do you.

After all, this mental way of reaching fulfillment can at least make your life be good enough. Obviously you want stuff in your life and your body has needs that need to be fulfilled. Without this, happiness will be harder to reach. However, just mindset and meditation can do a lot of work on the way towards emotions.

Meditation and mindset do one thing mainly: they protect you from getting hurt. There will still be pain, but it won’t affect you that much anymore. Pain is temporary; it will go away. And there are live lessons that will or will not make us learn to not let these painful things hurt our soul. So instead of clinging to your pain, let it go. This is mainly about emotional pain. If you do it right, you will notice that it will feel much better if you just accept and let go.

3. Character

Now instead of seeking only egoistic matters, improve your character. This is something very necessary, but most people forget it during self-improvement. The character trait includes many things, like charisma and humor, but also kindness. After all, we live in a society with other people that also have dreams, wishes, and needs. And society profits from kindness, while it rots when people become more and more egoistic. Additionally, the other character values you possess will assist you in various aspects of life, such as dating and your career.

First, charisma is one of the most important skills you can learn. It can improve your social life and career and help you talk to people better. Let’s face it, the truth is, everyone likes people who are truly charismatic. I am not referring to individuals who dominate conversations and, in 99% of cases, only discuss themselves. No, instead I am talking about those that use their words with precision and care.

These individuals have completely mastered their charisma. After all, I also have to admit that I am not one of those people. I improved my charisma considerably, but I am still learning. And if you are already at a high level of charisma, I don’t have anything to teach you. But for those here who are still struggling with conversations, I can help you gain more confidence.

But next to charisma, you also need to become a better human. Please consider being more kind and offering assistance to others whenever possible. Your kindness will make others happy, and you may discover it makes you happy too. Giving to people is fun. So try it out. But you should also know the standard etiquette of your country. I am talking about what is acceptable to do and what is not. Be friendly, be kind and if it’s required, be early when meeting. These are just examples; there are many things you can improve to become a kinder and compassionate human. So this discussion must continue in a later article.

4. Health and Physique

Obviously the health and physique part should also not be forgotten. Many people continue to do this, and if you haven’t yet, I recommend considering a change. If you haven’t already incorporated this, I recommend considering it. This, however, needs to be done right. You should avoid using substances like steroids. When I say health and physique are important, I mean it. Don’t sacrifice your health for a better physique. In most cases it then takes longer to attain a well-trained body, but so what? All the efforts will return later; it just takes more time. And it’s especially important to live a long and lasting life.

So what workouts should you do? There are many options. First you need to train your muscles. For this purpose, you have options, like calisthenics or standard lifting in the gym. The second one is pretty straightforward to follow, but it will take money every month. If you do not have the money, calisthenics is the best way to go.

Second, you need to train your heart and lungs. The best way to do that is with endurance exercises. There, you also have many options. Bicycling is one, but it will take a lot of time. Most people just run, since it’s the fastest way to achieve it. However, running is the worst option for your joints. If you frequently experience joint problems or have a family history of such issues, then exercise caution. Use techniques to protect them. Like use proper running shoes, special socks for jogging, and whatever else you find.

Alternatively, you can do a sport called Thai Chi. This once was a martial arts practice; it still can be, but it’s now mainly used for health practices. It will not only train your endurance and heart but also mainly your legs. It can be used to replace leg exercise, especially when you are still a beginner.

Finally, you need to stretch. This is vital for many reasons. Mostly, flexibility is useful. But for health reasons, it protects you from injury. Obviously you can use stretching before and after the workout, but I highly advise doing at least one to two big sessions of stretching a week. This procedure makes you more flexible and healthy. You can either use normal stretches or do yoga, Pilates, or any other methods that stretch your body.

Use all these techniques weekly and combine them with a nutritious diet. Then your health and physique will improve. And with a better physique comes a better look, too.

5. Seek Wisdom

A warrior who has not learned is a dumb philosopher, but a philosopher that has not trained is a weak philosopher. Be neither of those. Instead of just focusing on training your body, train your mind too. This is the reason why you always should seek wisdom. What you learn is your choice, but it will benefit your life.

You will desire a specific career path in your life. Yes, you can learn from that, and you should. Improve yourself in that job; learn everything you can learn. Use the Internet for knowledge. These skills will give you success in life. If you don’t learn or train for this job, you will probably regret it.

But this is not the only knowledge you need. There is the whole internet full of knowledge and wisdom, but you need to discover it. These days, some people turn away from the media and the internet to shield themselves from the madness prevalent on social media. But this is problematic, because those people will miss out on all the knowledge that lies inside the internet.

Learn how to resist distraction. This is the most important. But for the beginning, you can also use tools to block certain sites that will poison your brain. Also train your YouTube algorithm. Make it so that it only shows self-improvement videos and other knowledge videos. This will make YouTube a channel of learning instead of one for pleasure and dopamine. If you still want some entertaining videos for your breaks, then create two accounts. One for knowledge and one for entertainment. This way you don’t get distracted while seeking wisdom.

If you have time, then instead of using entertainment your whole day, watch something beneficial, like a documentary, for example. You can also put in one or more hours a day just for random learning. Not planned learning, just things that you want to learn in that moment or that you just randomly find. Over time this will make you more and more educated and knowledgeable.

Conclusion

In short, self-improvement is not just one thing that you need to change; it’s a whole process of things that you change to be better. And there is always something, even if it’s little, that you can improve. But don’t seek for perfection, since that is not useful. Working out is a great start, yes, and working on your career is also great, but there is more to it. Work on your character; with that I mean charisma, but also your kindness. Be a good human in every aspect of life.

Choose not only wealth and temporary pleasure, but seek for something that fulfills you long-term. Especially conquering your own mind will make you stronger and better. Sure, you can get more wealth, a partner, and found a family, but remind yourself that nothing is permanent in this lifetime. Pain and loss are unfortunately part of it, so accept this part as well, because without the end, there is no start. Instead, improve your mindset and learn to be resilient. This can make you way more fulfilled than any material thing can make you.